Gerbils and Toddlers

****No Gerbils were hurt in the making of this short story!****



I leave Callie and Doug alone together for ONE day and what do they do?
They go pick out another pet!
Not just *A PET* but a little, frail Gerbil.
My daughter? SHE'S TWO.
The LAST thing she needs is ANYTHING smaller than a Great Dane, to play with.

Needless to say, conveniently he leaves for work with this Gerbil that my daughter is dying to play with...And me. Not a huge Gerbil fan here. Or anything small...with teeth.

Gerbils are finicky. Don't really care fore sudden movement. Don't really care for a toddler Grabbing it by it's tail and trying to kiss it. They don't really like a toddler to have her head half in the cage and *squeal in excitement*. (Did I say squeal...I meant a blood curdling, ear deafening shriek.)

She wants it in "The Ball". Anyone with a Gerbil knows "The Ball". You know...little plastic clear balls with air holes. They run around the house running themselves into random objects.

So here I am...With A toddler, A Gerbil cage (with Gerbil of course) and "The Ball". So I'm thinking to myself..How does one get a gerbil into "The Ball" without touching the Gerbil? After numerous attempts...nothing. Finally after a good amount of time I grab the little guy by the tail and toss him into "The Ball". Put the lid on and sat the thing on the floor.

Cute, He walks around and every once in a while a Toddler shoves the ball across the room. NOT good. She also likes to pick the ball up and kiss it, she isn't "gentle", to say the least. I even saw her try to kick the ball once. Needless to say, she was in "time out" a bit tonight. And sobbed at bed time because I wouldn't put the cage in her BED.

In all actuality though...The Gerbil is good to her so far. Callie herself needs to work on how she handles him. :) But hopefully in time, she'll figure it out. Hopefully Mommy will figure it out too, because that little thing freaks me out.

I won't deny the fact that he's cute. Hope his little teeth don't grow much.


BTW....Did I mention Callie named him Buddy? Yep, she picked this exact Gerbil and named him. Her first pet, somewhat of a milestone if you ask me. Now if we can keep it alive.....I'll be happy.

In Callie's words...

"I love Buddy the Mouse Mommy. Don't you touch him. He's my Buddy!"

The one an only.....Drum roll please......


BUDDY THE MOUSE (who is actually a Gerbil)

And Him.

I'll always love her.

Your fingertips across my skin
The palm trees swaying in the wind
Images
You sang me Spanish lullabies
The sweetest sadness in your eyes
Clever trick

Well, I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

[Chorus]
Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

We walked along a crowded street
You took my hand and danced with me
Images
And when you left, you kissed my lips
You told me you would never, never forget
These images

No

Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

[Chorus]
Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
Without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just fine

Did I make it that
Easy to walk right in and out
Of my life?

[Chorus]
Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should have known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

My name is Rachel, I have a problem!

So as I'm walking through the house today, I saw a few things that made me giggle. So here I am...sharing my problem with the world.


On top of a table in my Dinning room.


The "stuff" in my purse.


My Jewels...HA


Bathroom, Nail polish


A box I keep jewlery in..


My fridge...





I can't help but smile when I see these things. No wonder people think I'm nuts. Nothing like reaching in your purse for change and pulling out Ammo! HA.

Shame on you America:
the only country where we have homeless without shelter, children going to bed without eating, elderly going without needed meds, and mentally ill without treatment-yet we have a benefit for the people of Haiti on 12 TV stations. Raising over 57 million already. 99% of the people won't have the guts to copy and repost this.


Can't take care of anyone else, if you can't take care of yourself. And obviously...WE CAN'T.

Kids, Kool Aid and Food Coloring

Isn't it funny how one can tell how their whole day is going to turn out, all before 11 am?

Callie woke me up today at 7 am (Too early, even for her) due to our "PACK of dogs" freaking out over some kind of stupid animal outside. I dealt with it, woke up with a smile and tried like mad to keep that smile.

I had housework to do, and since my daughter is such a good little girl, I didn't worry too much. She had 4 rooms in which she could access while I was doing my work. Living Room, Dining room, Bathroom and Kitchen. I was in the kitchen.

During her night time baths I have been putting 3 drops of different colored food coloring in her water for fun...so there were 2 bottles of coloring on the second from top shelf on the shower wall. She also had a full cup of Kool Aid on the coffee table.

At one point she comes in to the kitchen (as I'm doing dishes) and says "Mommy, I think I made a mess!". Anyone who has a toddler knows that they make messes, usually with their toys (but other things tend to happen as well). I asked her if it was her toys and she nodded. I told her to go pick it up. At this point, I hear her in the living room putting things away singing the "clean up" song. Thinking to myself, "What a good little girl I have!"

Silence struck a few minutes after. Thinking she was watching TV I finished up my dishes. I was in the Kitchen a total of 20 minutes (maybe less).

As I'm walking out to the living room I see the bathroom light is on and the door is closed. THIS CAN'T BE GOOD. Immediately, I open the bathroom door to find my "Good little girl" sitting in the bathtub with no water, and a bottle of red food coloring and a bottle of blue food coloring...EVERYWHERE, I must add. Red and blue mixed together makes purple. So there she is, covered in purple dye. Hand prints on the tub, toilet, sink and door frame (But not one drop on her clothes). At this point, I can't strip her down because the dye would get everywhere (that it wasn't already) so I rolled up her sleeves turned the tub water on and got it off her hands and toes. Her hands were still tinted a light purple/pink color. I'll deal.

I hurry to clean the mess in hopes that it wouldn't stain anything too bad. And for the most part it came out BUT...I have these itty bitty pink hand prints up and down my WHITE door frame (as high up as she could reach). I'm upset but know that it's nothing a little paint won't fix.

I sit her on the toilet and have a nice long talk with her then tell her to go to time out. She goes willingly and seems to be excited about going to time out with pink hands. ugh. As I'm walking her to time out...I look into the living room...

OH HELL...

A whole glass of red Kool Aid is dumped all over my carpet. My Carpet isn't a dark color FYI nor is it the best carpet...BUT the last thing I want is a HUGE pink circle in the middle of my floor. (Another UGH). So as she is sitting in time out I grab the laptop and try to find a good way to get red dye (kool Aid) out of white-ish carpet. For the most part, it's up. I'm exhausted, I'm pissy and I need a freaking vacation. ALONE. No husbands, no child.....100% ALONE.

Moral of my story?

1. No matter if you think your house is Child-Safe...it probably isn't. Kids can and WILL find a way to the top shelf IF they want what is up there.

2. Silence is NEVER good when we are talking about toddlers.

3. When your child has pink hands, Time out is a lot less effective.

4. Kool Aid...SUCKS. Yes, it's cheap. Yes, Kids love it.....But simply put, IT'S THE DEVIL.

5. Food coloring is also THE DEVIL.

6. Kool aid can in fact come out of carpet. Use dawn dish soap, Water, An Iron and a towel. It ain't easy (but then again, what is?)

7. DO NOT TRUST YOUR LITTLE SNOT NOSED KID. Believe me on this one.


Now.....Now my day is pretty much toast. I've spent the last hour and a half trying to clean up red, pink, and blue dye all over my house. My daughters hands are still pink/purple and I NEED A FUCKING VACATION.

E.M.G.

Thinking about you tonight.

Always remembered.